I worry
I worry. A lot.
Sometimes I think that’s just the way I am. You know, one of those people who can’t relax even if everything is fine. Maybe that’s who I am. But money problems always increase this. And I’m sick of worrying, tired of thinking about whether I’ll have something to eat (and yes, sometimes it’s that bad).
I am sick of it. It made me even more nervous, and it gave me grey hairs and constant stress.
I am sick of not having money, and I am sick of not knowing if I’ll ever have a decent job (and it’s not like I’m uneducated or lazy).
The problem is not the lack of money per se, but the anxiety and the fact you can’t concentrate on other things-and there are other things you should pay attention to, things that require your energy and the things you like to do.
So yeah, this was a whining post. Thanks for listening.
Possibly related
24 Aug 10 at 2:06 PM | Diary (Personal) | 8 comments
Natasha W
Wishing you well.
24 Aug 10 at 3:57 PM
zekjevets
i feel ya. this past summer was a whole of intense puddle-jumping to make it through with my financial security intact. it got pretty bad at times too — often thought i might have to drop out of school.
keep your hopes up though. worked for me. eventually, with a little determination, i pulled through it and got myself into a better situation.
good luck!
25 Aug 10 at 5:07 AM
Jasmin
Aw, I’m sorry you have so much to worry about!
Don’t worry about being a worrier (yes, I see the irony)–sometimes that just what you need to do to make yourself feel better. Even though it is stressful, sometimes it makes me feel better to have exhausted all of the possibilities (even if I focus a bit too much on the negative ones). And a nice back massage from the hubby can help ease the resulting physical tension. I’ve got my fingers crossed!
26 Aug 10 at 5:20 AM
Mira
Thanks, people!
I think one of the main problems here is that I should be looking for a real job soon, and my country is in a real, real mess when it comes to that (though not in a way Americans often see Eastern Europe). So I am uncertain about the future, because I’d really want to find a semi-decent job (it’s not like I’m not educated), and it’s next to impossible.
On the other hand, it looks like I’m tied to this place in a way (even though I don’t consider myself particularly patriotic) so I’m not looking for possibilities to go somewhere else.
Jasmin,
You might be right about worrying = exhausting all of the possibilities.
The problem is, you get exhausted (ha!) quickly, and it’s stressful.
26 Aug 10 at 1:49 PM
TBLACK SKY
I know this is an old post…
But I worry the same way. Most times…everything is fine, but I stil have layers of anxiety. And the more money I make, the more I worry about having to make more money. Sometimes I wish I could just live on a beach and throw away all the trappings of this American society.
23 Sep 10 at 2:53 AM
Mira
TBLACK SKY,
Thanks for commenting! (It’s ok to comment on old posts).
Some people do worry a lot. I know I am one of them, but I don’t know how to rid of it. I think the worry might be due to stress, the more you work, the more you worry, and you just need to take a rest.
On the other hand, there are people who just don’t know how to relax and how always find the reason to worry. It’s not a good thing. I don’t want to turn into such a person!
23 Sep 10 at 5:08 PM
Iva
Tata je govorio da ?e nas greške koje smo pravili kao mladi uništiti kad budemo stari, možda bi zato trebalo da nastavimo da radimo izvan svojih mogu?nosti, ?isto da obezbedimo sebi nešto, nešto lagodniji život.
Ja sam, kao, napravila dobar izbor što sam nastavila da se bavim dizajnom. Istovremeno, ?injenica da sam izgubila socijalno i da nemam staž je loš izbor. Nebriga o umnjacima koji su se pokvarili pre godinu i po dana je loš izbor, itd.
Pobogu, moramo da brinemo. Samo tako ?emo sagledati sve sa realne strane.
18 Oct 10 at 1:38 AM
Mira
Znam, ali briga te ponekad proguta. Umori se covek od toga.
Sto se tice staza, mislim da ti mzoes to sama sebi da uplacujes. Mnogi to tako rade. Ni ja nemam ni staz ni socijalno, a nemam ni novac da sama sebi uplacujem. Ali moracu da pocnem cim dobijem neke pare, zato sto vecina poslodavaca te danas ne prijavljuje. I morma da pocnem da trazim bolji posao.
A sto se tice zubara, i ja moram da idem, cim skupim neke pare. Ispala mi je plomba i rupa u zubu se pokvarila, a jos na dosta zuba imam po koju tackicu karijesa.
18 Oct 10 at 10:41 AM