The obvious one: join only the things you really like, not the things you think you SHOULD like (kids, romance, your country – language – city fanlisting, peace etc).
Don’t join anything (a clique, fanlisting, message board or a commercial website) unless you really feel you should. Meaning: don’t join if you’re bored, if the subject is just a popular thing of the moment, or similar.
Don’t join simply because you want to run a personal site and you need a large “joined” section.
Read the rules
Sometimes, they’re mean, but it’s “their” website, and “they” have right to do whatever they want. If you don’t like the rules, don’t join. If a fanlisting is a TFL.org listed, you could report it to the staff, but don’t join. If rules of a clique say: “you must have a site”, don’t try to join without a site, leaving a pathetic note in the comments field: “i dont have a webbie, could ya please list me, coz i want to join”. It doesn’t work that way.
If they ask for your name, give your Name, or a Nickname. I bet that Cute_gurl882 is not your name, and chances are that in a case of leaving such a nick you a) will be listed as anonymous, or b)you won’t be listed at all. If you really want to be listed under a “weird” nickname (you know what I mean here!) try to explain your reasons to webmasters.
If they require a link (code) back, take the code, save it to your own server, link back on an appropriate page (“joined”, “fan of”, splash page or similar), and then join. Don’t join before you put the code up, unless rules say so.
Don’t make a fool of yourself
Remember that at least 99% of fanlistings are not officially related to the subject (same goes for fansites), so don’t send fan mails to webmasters, saying things such: “Ooh, I’m so in love with …(put a name here)… and could you please give me his phone number/email address/tell me which his fav colour is, etc. Most of the fanlistings, cliques and fansites are owned by fans: fans like you, who don’t have any contact with celebrities. So, don’t make a fool of yourself by sending pathetic fanmails, especially if you read these words in site’s disclaimer: “We are not affiliated with …”